A woman in Lake Carmel, New York called the police when she saw what appeared to be a human leg sticking out of a dryer at her local laundromat. When the cops arrived, they found that the man wasn't dead, merely drunk. He said he was walking home from a nearby bar, and ducked into the laundromat to get warm. Police say there's no law against sleeping in a dryer, so no charges will be filed.
Bre, a UFO expert from New Zealand, says President George Bush launched an attack against Iraq this week to keep Saddam Hussein from using the technology he acquired when an alien spacecraft crashed in Iraq in 1998. He said that normally, the president of the United States would not have a high enough security clearance to have been told about Saddam's secret weapon. "You have to have MK Ultra clearance, before you are given access to such things as reverse engineering alien technology," he said. But former President George Bush Senior was once head of the CIA, and he told his son what he knew about Iraq's alien technology. One of Bre's American correspondents claims that former President Bill Clinton also knew Saddam's secret. She told Bre in an email that Clinton decided against attacking Iraq in 1998, after Saddam expelled the United Nations' weapons inspectors, for fear he would use alien technology against the American military.
The Fred Hartman Bridge and Houston Ship Channel were closed for nearly an hour while authorities inspected a mysterious box. A tugboat operator had called the Coast Guard to report that someone in a small boat had placed the box on one of the bridge supports. The boat was stopped, and the package x-rayed. It turned out to contain a dead cat. The cat's name, and its dates of birth and death, were written on the side of the box. Coast Guard spokesman Rob Wyman praised the operator for reporting the incident. "This is a great example of exactly what we have been asking the maritime community to do. We are very pleased it worked out the way it did," Wyman said.
Police in Minnesota say they may have a bird to thank for obtaining a DNA sample from a suspect in a sexual assault. The unidentified victim described how a man entered her home around 2:30 AM, came into her bedroom, jumped on top of her, and put a pillow over her face. During the ensuing struggle, she was able to push the pillow aside for long enough to see his face and his Minnesota Vikings jacket. Then, she heard her attacker say, "Ouch." Suddenly, he threatened to kill her bird and left the apartment. Police arrived after a neighbor who had heard her screaming called 911. They found blood on the sheets, and also on the bird's beak. "The beak on this bird looks to be pretty sharp. I wouldn't want it biting me," said Stan Johnson, a sheriff's department investigator. The blood will be compared to a sample taken from Kaai.
Police in Belgium have arrested a man they found grazing in a field. Witnesses said they saw Jurgen Tersago crawl out of his car and into the field. When police arrived, Tersago was down on his hands and knees, grunting like a pig and munching grass. A subsequent test revealed that his blood alcohol level was over the legal drink-drive limit. During his drunk driving trial, he told the judge, "I like eating grass, especially when I'm drunk. It tastes like spinach." He was fined £680, about $1000, and had his driving priveleges suspended for 45 days.
A teenager in Winnepeg, Canada was killed in a bizarre game involving a shovel and a stolen car. Fourteen year old Roger Ledger and his friends stole a Chrysler Intrepid, and began to play a game in which someone would throw a shovel through the open window of the car each time the driver brought it around the block. During one round, the shovel hit Ledger in the head, killing him almost instantly. His friends panicked and fled. Police found Ledger's body in the abandoned car the next morning. Criminal charges will likely be filed.
Melinda Kelley, who over the weekend called 911 to report that her car had been stolen with her infant son inside, now faces charges of filing a false report, and of burglary. Kelley has admitted that she broke into a home in Glenville, New York, then forgot where she parked her car. She called the police, claiming that her car had been stolen while she was shopping in nearby Scotia. The car, and the baby, were found a short while later, but Kelley's wallet had been stolen while the unlocked car was parked.
A group of children in Wales are receiving counselling after a headless corpse fell on them from above. The children were playing under a bridge near their suburban homes, when the body of a man in his 50s plummeted from the sky. The man had apparently hanged himself, with a wire noose, from the 40-foot-high bridge; when he dropped, the noose decapitated him. His head was found nearby.
A woman from Westchester, New York is in police custody after a "bizarre" sex game went terribly wrong. Police say that Sheila Davalloo, 33, and her 36-year-old husband, Paul Christos, were playing a game involving handcuffs and a blindfold, when Sheila got a paring knife from the kitchen and stabbed Paul in the chest. Deputy Police Commissioner William Rehm says he isn't certain whether that was part of the game or not. Paul begged his wife to take him to the hospital, and she finally agreed, but stabbed him again when they got to the hospital parking lot. Passersby heard them arguing in the car, and someone called 911. Paul underwent surgery for stab wounds to the chest and back; Sheila fled, but was quickly apprehended. She is being held without bail.
(Newsday)
The tugboat was moored in the Khawr abd Allah River, which separates Kuwait from Iraq. A British team boarded it on the first day of the war, looking for mines or other explosives, but found nothing. An American Coast Guard cutter checked it later in the day, and it came up clean. The next day, two Australian inflatables went out to run one final check. They did something neither the Americans nor the Brits had considered: They asked whether there were explosives on board. According to one of the Australian officers, they asked, "So, mate, have you got any weapons or explosives on board?" The tugboat captain "drew a picture showing how the 45-liter steel drums lined up on the deck had been welded together and then split down the middle to make a hinged shelter for dozens of mines," and said, "Explosive! Explosive!" pointing to the drums and a raft towed behind the tug.
Ships carrying humanitarian aid cannot proceed upriver to the port of Umm Kasar until the channel is cleared of mines. The river is being checked by an Australian warship, six British minesweepers, a Sea Stallion helicopter, a Polish ship and a US coastguard cutter. The port itself is being cleared by divers and two trained dolphins.
(The Age)
A Catholic priest in Italy was receiving the confession of a man who suddenly handed him a bag. "I'd like you to take these as well," he said. Inside, the priest found two handguns, two hand grenades, and 18 bullets. He immediately handed the weapons over to the police. Due to the sacrament of the confession, the priest cannot reveal what, if any, crimes the man may have confessed to, but says that, "I am just happy that he wanted to change his life, return to the Church and that he came to us for help." A police spokesman has said that the weapons have been sent to a ballistics lab for testing.
(Ananova)
A visitor to the Canada Agriculture Museum, in Ottowa, was arrested after museum employees found him receiving oral sex from a cow and her calf. David Sutin, a spokesman for the museum, said, "His, I would characterize it as nervous, behaviour during previous visits had us keep an eye on him and then with what happened yesterday we thought it was prudent to call the police." The incident allegedly occurred in a public barn, but no other museum patrons witnessed it. He has been charged with two counts of bestiality, one count of committing an indecent act and one count of mischief.
(Canoe)
Harry the Hawk, a popular performer from Thorp Perrow Arboretum, in Yorkshire, will not being doing any more live displays. Tom Graham, who owns Harry, cited a string of incidents that culminated in Harry stealing, and attempting to eat, an audience member's toupee. The toupee debacle was the result of a "bunny dummy" stunt, in which a piece of brown fur is thrown into the audience for the hawk to retrieve. Harry landed on a man in the audience, then took off with the man's toupee clutched in his talons. “By the time we got the toupée off Harry, it had a bald patch. The crowd thought it was part of the act but the owner was a bit disgruntled,” Graham said. Previously, Harry had punctured a bouncy castle, and walked through an ice cream vendor's stock. "He just became too mischievous and was doing his own thing," Graham explained. "He was losing his fear of people. But he has been a brilliant bird over the years. He is certainly a character." Harry will now be retired to the Arboretum's breeding program, after 15 years in the spotlight. One presumes he will enjoy his new career.
(The Sun and Ananova)
A man clad only in his underwear has been arrested for causing some £75,000 (almost $120,000) damage to shop fronts along the main streets of Cardiff, Wales. According to the South Wales Police, Andrew Roxberry, an unemployed man with 217 prior offenses, smashed two windows in one shop with a bottle, then, "Having gained the appetite for breaking windows, he picked up a shovel used by workmen and went on to smash 43 windows in total at a further 22 shops." Security cameras recorded his destructive orgy, which ended only when the police arrived. Roxberry has refused to speak since his arrest.
(BBC,
Investigators in Norway believe that the UFO sighted in Lardal recently was most likely a dead cat. A number of peope reported seeing a fireball that exploded in the sky and then drifted to earth. After the sighting, investigators found the charred body of a cat near some electrical lines. It appears that the cat climbed the power pole and touched a live wire, electrocuting itself and creating a sensation in the nearby town.
(Ananova, March)
